I know… it is an advertisement, but I saw it during my first week back at work after my spinal cord tumor surgery, and I have to tell you that it really resonated with me! I was feeling so broken, so fragile, so incapable of facing the challenges that were bombarding me. Then I saw this ad and my eyes filled with tears. Do what you can’t… that is my calling for the next year as I tackle this recovery. DO WHAT YOU CAN’T.
Being diagnosed with a spinal tumor has turned my world upside-down. Now most of my waking minutes are consumed with research and planning. One thing that I know I need to deal with sooner rather than later is the inevitable talk with my boss.
I had been planning to wait until I had a treatment plan, but last week something happened that makes me feel that I can’t keep putting this off. We had an all day professional development retreat. On a normal day, I alternate between sedentary seated desk work and teaching (which allows me to walk around the room), but during the retreat, I spent the first three hours seated. By lunch, I was in a lot of pain/discomfort. I stood while eating my lunch, and then I took a walk before the afternoon session began. During the afternoon sessions, I tried to alternate between sitting and standing. The pain/discomfort didn’t go away, but it didn’t get worse either. I watched the clock inch closer to 4 pm… the time when I would go back home and take some medicine to reduce the pain. However, at 3 o’clock, the person organizing the retreat announced that our last activity of the day would involve physical activity. Most of the participants were pleased. They were tired of sitting in their chairs, but his description of the activity made me panic. I was already in pain. How could I possibly participate in this activity?
I told my teammates that I would not be able to participate because I’ve been having back problems. They urged me to give it a try anyway, and I had to explain that I was already in a lot of pain. I couldn’t risk it.
They let me sit out during the activity, but I felt like I had let the group down. I also felt like I was no longer a full member of the team. I didn’t have the shared experience of facing the challenge with them. And, I suddenly had been singled out a being different from the rest of the team. I noticed my boss watching from the other side of the room, and I knew that I needed to tell him what was going on before he came to his own conclusions.
So, how do you tell your boss that you have a major medical problem like a spinal tumor? Fortunately, there are resources on the web that can help.
Most of the resources are related specifically to cancer. My tumor is probably benign, but many of the recommendations made for cancer patients also pertain to my situation. A really good resource that I have found is Cancer and Careers. They provide a wealth of information to help a newly diagnosed person decide when and how to share their diagnosis with co-workers and the boss. They also have information to help you navigate Family Medical Leave, the ADA, and your rights.
After reading everything on-line, I think I will wait and talk to my boss after my appointment with the neurosurgeon. Then I should have more information to share.
Here are some of the other resources I found: